Tuesday 14 February 2023

CONDOMS come in handy: ask a CUBAN

Waterproof trinkets by Stable Diffusion

That cheap universal contraceptive is a multi-purpose tool for Cubans.  Kids use them for slingshots and party balloons. Fishermen use them for floats. Women tie up their ponytails.  Chevie owners lubricate them to shine the dashboards.

Bar-hoppers fill them with rum when they so they only have to buy one drink. Vintners use them as stoppers on giant glass wine bottles - when the condoms are erect the carbon dioxide is evaporating; when they go limp the wine is ready to drink. Brilliant. Inspired, I filled one with water and dumped it from my balcony on a bunch of loud out-of-tune crooners. Condom revenge.

Subsidized by the Communist government, condoms are cheap – 10 pesos (four cents) for a package of three. Most are made in India and users complain that they have a bad smell. A good gift when you visit Cuba is to bring them as gifts. Hats off to the CUBANS.

Source: The Economist

Next week: A bunch of AI:s & Eki pull it off 


A submerged vocalist by Midjourney & Eki



Note: 

Here in Finland, the one-size-fits-all solution for all your life hacking needs is not condoms, but rather... pantyhose. It's a long-lasting tradition that the Niksi-Pirkka magazine publishes new creative uses for pantyhose in its user-submitted tips and tricks column. Over the decades, there must be hundreds now, if not thousands. Here's a Google translation of some select ones.

As for the creative uses of condoms, they're good for waterproofing gear. Microphones do not like water, and it's a well-known trick to put the mic in a condom if you need to submerge it to record some scuba action. Or just to protect it from rain etc.

Finally - of course - I had to ask ChatGPT for some creative life-hack uses for condoms. 
  1. Waterproofing your phone or other electronics.
  2. Protecting a cast or bandage during showering or swimming.
  3. Storing and preserving small items, such as matches or USB drives, in a waterproof and airtight container.
  4. Stretching over the top of a can or jar to create a tight seal and prevent spills or leaks.
  5. Using as a makeshift rubber band or hair tie.
  6. Slipping over a microphone to protect it from wind or moisture.
  7. Covering a wound or blister to keep it clean and dry.
  8. Holding ice or cold packs in place for first aid or pain relief.
  9. Filling with water and freezing to create an improvised ice pack.
  10. Using as a glove to protect hands during messy tasks, such as painting or cleaning.
  11. Using as a grip enhancer for tools, sports equipment, or even pens and pencils.
  12. Slipping over the end of a vacuum cleaner hose to create a makeshift dusting brush.
  13. Covering the end of a shower head to create a rain-like water flow.
  14. Filling with lotion or other fluids and sealing shut to create a portable travel-sized container.
  15. Using as a protective cover for a bike seat or handlebars during rain or snow.
  16. Stretching over a lightbulb to create a diffused lighting effect.
  17. Covering the foot of a walker or cane to create a non-slip grip on smooth surfaces.
  18. Using as a makeshift water balloon for impromptu outdoor games.
  19. Filling with birdseed and hanging to create a DIY bird feeder.
My microphone trick got on the list - the others are pretty good too.

CU
--
Eki

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